If you’re looking for a good time* call 0456 426 599.
*Please note that my definition of good time may differ from yours. For me, a good time includes each of the following:
- you using good grammar and not mixing metaphors;
- me correcting you when you use bad grammar and mix metaphors;
- no silences, awkward or otherwise;
- not too much talking or noise;
- neither of us looking at our phone or watch. The temptation to check our phones or watches should be high, and remain that way;
- you laugh at my jokes;
- you detect when what I am saying is a joke, including when I give no verbal or physical cue to suggest I am doing a joke;
- you don’t laugh at me when I’m not doing a joke;
- you do a joke and I then deconstruct it and explain how it could have been funnier;
- we leave at the exact right time;
- when we are leaving, we walk away in different directions, even if we (you) were going to go the way I was going.