Man challenge

These are the rules of the man challenge.

1. Definition: a ‘man challenge’ is when a man looks at another man who in public and the eyes of the two men meet.
2. Definition 2: ‘another man’ is a man the first man does not know.
3. In the event of a man challenge, the man who instigated the challenge (ie looked at the other man) must, upon discovering that his look has been noticed and his eyes have been met, immediately look away.
4. If a man challenger does not immediately look away, the other man becomes the man challenger. This means both men are man challenging one another. This is a proper man challenge.
5. In the event of a proper man challenge, either man is obliged to look away.
6. Definition: ‘look away’ means the man pretends he was looking at something else in the distance, or his eyes were simply tracking across the landscape and the man challenge was merely a matter of misinterpretation.
7. If a man looks away, the other man has won the man challenge.
8. The winner of a man challenge, who has successfully not looked away, is entitled to perceive himself as a tough and strong man.
9. The loser of a man challenge is wimpy, and must at his earliest convenience seek out another man to man challenge to enable himself to feel tough and strong.
10. The loser of a man challenge must, until such time as he has successfully competed in a subsequent man challenge, give himself some semblance of masculinity by treating a woman or child with little or no respect.
11. The winner of a man challenge may instigate another man challenge at any time, and is likely to succeed given his feeling of tough and strongness.
12. In the event that neither man looks away, the man challenge reaches critical man mass, and can be resolved in one or both of two ways. The men must fuck and/or fight.